Danger. Pain

  Danger, the exposure or vulnerability to harm or risk. It seems like every situation I am in I feel as though I am danger. It only takes one small decision to drastically change ones life.


  Pain, an unpleasant sensation occurring in varying degrees of severity as a consequence of injury, disease, or emotional disorder. Physical pain is only temporary. If pain is severe enough you will not forget how it was caused. 


  When I am in certain situations my body goes into the fight or flight response. In my stomach thousands of butterflies flutter, my heart rests in my throat, every movement is awkward and my thoughts machine gun away.  These feelings should come across in events of danger. These feelings should come across right before an instance of great pain. The thing is, I go through the flight or flight response multiple times a day.
Having this happen to me multiple times a day for over 5 years is ruining my composure. Day to day life is becoming a fight I am beginning to lose. What is with me? 


Thinking sometimes ruins your day. Being aware just ruins your perception of things.


I wish I was ignorant sometimes.


Oh and day 3 without scraping my pipes bowl. Week 1 with ought smoking any bud. Sometimes I think there is just no point.


that is all
  

My Cultural Identity

            My individual culture can best be described simply with an mp3 player. I have grown up with music being a key part in my life. My father being a musician, played music nonstop since I was born. When I listen to music I listen to each sound and beat, reading the lyrics in my head as the song plays. The newly learned ideals being remembered, only to be sorted later while in deep thought. Many of my morals and ideas come from the music I have heard throughout life.  Not following popular culture is a philosophy I have adopted from understanding music. I feel that some forms of popular media can control culture, and I think it can destroy some individualism. With every song played I gain knowledge and distrust society more and more. Without music I would not have thought about how people are used as pawns so other people can live comfortably without worry.

            While growing up I have gone through many phases and each phase can be recorded with the introduction of a new artist or genre. From my discovery of punk to my new found love of classic rock,  each leap of direction is started by profound life experiences. Even today when I play Nirvana my memory of my child hood flashes before my eyes. I remember it playing on my clock radio as I bounced around my room in a state of total anarchy, flinging legos about and screaming at the top of my lungs. As I started school pop music was the thing to love, and like any fad I was pulled into the stream unaware of the lameness. As I began to question my surroundings as I grew older and wiser. While in middle school I discovered the punk ideology and rebelliousness. I continued hating rules developing a strong disgust for the government.  Shoplifting and being untruthful were daily things I were involved with. I still feel a strong dislike toward society and the laws I was forced to abide by.   As I entered high school I changed my mood toward classic rock and became accustomed to the more relaxing music. Listening to this music made me feel closer to my parents who grew up with classic rock.  As I started smoking sensimilla, I began listening to sublime gaining much insight from their music. With each step in complexity and simplicity I gained knowledge. I became completely vexed by the inciting beat of the drums. With each change in tempo, my mood shifts.

            As I go through the day I think of the musicians life and what their life lessons can teach me. I think of the lifelong struggles they may have faced, and how I can use them to free me from my life's prison. I  am an individual who is full of energy. Music helps me set my problems aside, get up and go.  Each day helping me escape my peers and the boring lifestyle they are accustomed too. Music gives me that tingly feeling in my gut that tells I can do anything. To me it is the fuel that bounces me to work or to school. As I listen to music it reminds me of the time I first listened to it. I feel the mood and see the surroundings as if it were dejavu.

            Music is the best form of philosophy because music isn't bias. The sounds draw you in and trap you, letting the words rip at your mind. Attention is always focused on the melody while subliminally processing the meaning. We challenge or ideas and remake our beliefs while stuck following the rhythm. My culture is always changing with every realization and every conversation. I chose an mp3 player because as I grow so does my library and my memories.

Music

  I fucking love music. I just thought I would share my love with the internets. When I listen to music I feel lost in the sound, my emotions are one with the sound and the flow. To me music is a drug, it numbs me but not really. I would say that music helps me ignore my problems, the soothing pleasurable sounds take my attentions away from boredom or depression, and drops my mind off in an interact-able experience.

 The feeling you receive from paying attentions to the sounds of music rely on many things (forgot the word), the emotions can come from a memory associated with the song, the sounds from the song itself, or the feeling can come about due to the situation one is in while listening to the song.  When I am drunk as fuck, my friend driving the car with  fast paced electronic music pumping, I feel like fucking great grisly god.

 I am a drummer, I play when I feel it is time to. My drum set is pure shit. It was purchased by my fathers ex wife who he was getting back together with. They had some sort of falling out or something. A couple weeks after receiving the set this lady killed herself. She drove off a 550 foot cliff in Colorado.

I can surly say the drum set sounds much better.


:)

I am a horrible writer.

BE GETTING BETTER.

Geneder roles and stereotypes

Gender roles

Stereotypes of Gender

-       Male

-       Female

-       Gay male

-       Gay female

***Stereotypes are usually derived from truth***

Do we have gender roles?

Put at least one stereotype for all.

Gender roles

Portrait of traditional female roles

-       Some stereotypes associated with the traditional female role include a woman’s

o   Warmth, expressiveness, and nurturance

o   Dependence

o   Tendency to be emotional and intuitive

o   Passivity and submissiveness

o   Tendency to be more interested in relationships than in professional accomplishments

***Female roles are changing.***

Developing sexual values

-       Sexual behavior should be consistent with one’s value system

-       Sexual abstinence is an option and means different things to different people, cultures, and religious groups

-       Sexually responsible decisions involve considering the possible consequences of sexual behavior, both for oneself and one’s partner

-       Learning to establish boundaries is of major importance in being true to one’s values

Misconceptions about sexuality

-       Woman are not as sexually desirable when they initiate sex

-       As people get older, they are bound to lose interest in sex

-       By their very nature, men are sexually aggressive

-       The more physically attractive a person is, the more sexually exciting he or she is

-       Being attracted to someone of the same gender Is abnormal

Some concerns about sexuality

-       concerns that many people have about sexuality include

o   Worrying about performance standards

o   Contracting sexually transmitted infections

o   Being preoccupied with one’s bodies

o   Feeling responsible for a partner’s dissatisfaction

o   Experiencing guilt sexual feelings or behavior

o   Worrying if one is normal

notes from professor

The Modification Of Social-Phobic Behaviors

TL;DR
Read Abstract

Abstract

The purpose of this behavior modification is to reduce symptoms of social anxiety. Methods used to modify the negative behavior associated with this disorder will be: positive thinking, progressive relaxation, and the use of a random webcam chat website on the Internet to develop interpersonal skills and an immunity to criticism. Social interactions will be compared on the basis of consistency of avoidance, the amount of overwhelming anxiousness, the amount of overwhelming awkwardness, and the rate of successful interaction.  Previously recorded social interactions after being thoroughly analyzed, showed that a wider the range of social experience, and the use of positive thinking in combination with a relaxation technique dramatically increase the rate for a successful interaction.

The Modification of the Mental and Physical Symptoms of Social Anxiety

Introduction

            This study on the modification of several behaviors related to social anxiety disorder, sheds light on working methods to curb the physical and psychological symptoms associated with the disorder. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (2010), 15 million American adults age 18 and over, or about 6.8 percent of people in this age group in a given year, have social phobia.  Social anxiety is not a cure overnight disorder; it takes much time, patience, and will power to successfully reduce the physical and psychological symptoms. There are multiple drugs for anxiety but they are only temporary fixes, ”In fact, large-scale, long-range (i.e., longitudinal) studies over the past decade have consistently shown cognitive – behavioral therapy to be the only therapy that can be dependably relied upon to help people overcome clinical anxiety disorders,” explains Thomas A. Richards, Ph.D. (2010). This is why it is very important to relearn ones thought process, and not force it upon ones self. According to Hobart and William Smith Colleges (2010), “Relaxation exercises are easy to learn and implement and can be remarkably effective in addressing stress, test anxiety, all kinds of phobias and other similar concerns,” by using relaxation techniques in the face of physical turmoil, it is possible to once again regain control over one’s mind and body.

What is Social anxiety?

            Social anxiety disorder, also known as social phobia, involves intense fear of certain social situations. Stress caused by social anxiety can be great and effects a person both mentally and physically. The following situations are often stressful for people with social anxiety disorder: interacting socially; in situations involving a large body of people; being teased or criticized; talking with important people or authority figures; attending parties or other social gatherings; interacting with the opposite sex; making phone calls; going on dates; performing on stage; being watched while doing something; making small talk; public speaking; interacting with peers in school and in class; being the center of attention; meeting new people; speaking up in class or in a meeting; and being in a group of people (Smith & Jaffe-Gill, 2010).  Physical symptoms of social anxiety include: an elevated heart rate, muscle tension, muscle spasms, euphoria, sweating, dizziness, clammy hands, rapid breathing, dry mouth, nausea, trembling, blushing, and a lower speaking volume (Smith & Jaffe-Gill, 2010). Social anxiety causes multiple maladaptive emotional behaviors that when left unchecked can make everyday responsibilities difficult. Psychological symptoms may include: depression; low self-esteem; excessive self-consciousness; intense worry for days, weeks, or even months before an upcoming social situation; extreme fear of being watched or judged by others, especially people that you do not know; fear that others will notice that you are nervous; avoidance of social situations; and fear of acting in a way that will embarrass or humiliate yourself (Smith & Jaffe-Gill, 2010).

The avoidance associated with social anxiety can make it difficult for an individual to better ones self, and will in turn lead to a more severe case of anxiety. The constant fear of being exiled and humiliated can make it extremely difficult to interact with other people in a positive manner. The way society views fear as a weakness can add to the anxiety, even if one tries to immerse themselves in social situations, the realization that the person is in a great deal of fear and stress can cause a group to single out the person, causing an even greater deal of worry and apprehension. This effect can cause a vicious cycle that if left unchecked can diminish a person’s psyche.

Method

Practicing Social Interactions from a Comfortable Environment

Simple methods can be used to repress the physical and psychological symptoms of social anxiety. The practice of training the mind to interact socially and to deal with criticism can be done effectively without any real social consequences by using a webcam chat roulette website such as (http://shufflepeople.woome.com/). This website takes time to find people worth talking to because some men find it amusing to masturbate on camera, but with a little determination one can easily experiment with conversational skills. The beauty of this method is that one is never in harms way, no matter what you say, no matter what the other persons reaction is, there are no consequences. If one feels uncomfortable they can press the next button and start fresh with another person. The website can be described almost like a social videogame, where the goal is to hold a conversation as long as possible, and once the game is lost it can simply be restarted. These interactions will never get physical and there is no community backlash because one will never talk to the person ever again, unless contact information is exchanged. This method would be used for people who are uncomfortable with their conversational skills, and who are looking to test new conversation topics without fear of social rejection.

Progressive Relaxation

Social anxiety can cause a great deal of muscle tension, which in turn may cause an excess of worry. The mind cannot relax unless the body is relaxed as well, “learning to relax lessens the power of negative emotions,“ (Harling & Nyrup, 2005). The practice of progressive relaxation can help an individual understand their otherwise unknown tensions, and help them to obtain a relaxed state. Progressive relaxation is the process of completely tightening individual muscle groups and then completely relaxing them. The process goes through each group of muscles until eventually the entire body is in a completely relaxed state ( Hobart and William Smith Colleges, 2010). Anxiety can cause the body to go Fight or flight mode, mistaking social interaction with a threat. The body does not turn off this reaction until one either conquers the fear or flees. The individual may assume that everybody around them knows they are in this state, and they may multiply the otherwise small threat. If one can learn to relax fully they will be able to stop the fight or flight response that causes great stress in their bodies. Even if a person is psychologically comfortable their psyche can be diminished if their physical being is in turmoil. This illustrates the relations ship between physical and psychological well being. This method will be used to stop some of the physical symptom associated with social anxiety by performing the progressive relaxation technique when one becomes stressed in social situations.

The Use of Positive Thinking

            Negative thinking can be one of the main triggers of a social anxiety attack. Dr. Thomas A. Richards (2010) writes about changing bad habits by "restructuring" the mind by means of disputing irrational thoughts and beliefs and substituting rational thoughts and beliefs in their place. By thinking positive in the face of negativity the negative thoughts will eventually be replaced with positive thoughts. Negative thoughts will decrease ones self-esteem, reduce creativity, create a negative outlook on life, and make an individual magnify stressful situations to the point where it is almost impossible to function. If one thinks negatively they may have an apprehension to state what they truly feel.  This apprehension makes it very difficult to reach goals set by ones self. The goal of this modification will be to restructure ones habits of thinking with the ultimate goal of replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. Dr. Thomas A. Richards (2010) explains how it is important, in the cognitive process, to turn the tables on automatic negative thinking slowly. “One should start by replacing automatic negative thoughts and make them rationally neutral,” explains Richards (2010),” this neutral thinking is gradually moved up, always in a step-by-step manner, to a more realistic level,” these slight changes make it less difficult to think positive, because the thoughts are not forced upon ones self. By slowly changing ones thought process the modifications become ingrained. Eventually the automatic negative thoughts will be replaced.

Thinking positive will change ones perception. Instead of expecting yourself to impress other people, it is the other people who should impress you. This change of role will make a person feel more significant. For example, if one is in a large group of attractive people, one should not assume that they are more attractive. By convincing oneself that it is them who is the most attractive person, the feeling of being unwanted and insignificant based on appearance is avoided. This can make it easier to break out of one’s shell and communicate with others more freely without feeling unworthy. This method will be used before and in the process of social interaction. It will be used before to prime ones mind for the challenge ahead, and it will be used during the interaction to keep one from giving up.

Results

            Results are based on the likelihood of the physical and psychological symptoms of social anxiety dominating a social interaction.  A base line consisting of one week of normal social interaction will be compared with forty-nine days of modification. Several different methods will be tested in the certain social situations that bring about this anxiety. The effectiveness of each method will be measured by comparing similar conditions, one without using any new method and another similar situation using these new methods individually and in combination. The results will be used to find the most effective method of curbing the symptoms of social anxiety. The amount and the degree of symptoms will be compared to determine the success of each method.  My journal was thoroughly analyzed for the following elements: excessive anxiousness or nervousness, excessive awkwardness, and the avoidance of social situations. Successful interactions were based on comfort, lack of worry, and conversation.

By using these methods the likelihood for a successful interaction more than tripled; the likelihood for anxiousness dominating ones thought process after the modification decreased by 12.5%; the likelihood of having an awkward interaction after the modification was only one third of the baseline rate; and the likelihood of avoidance was completely eliminated. Percentages are based on the modification analysis document.

Discussion

            By improving ones conversational skills in an environment devoid of threats, the feeling of awkwardness decreases dramatically. By learning acceptable conversations before hand and testing them in the field, one learns ways to distract other people from the awkwardness of the situation, which in turn makes things less awkward for ones own self. By combining the newly gained experience with positive thinking anxiousness and awkwardness are decreased dramatically. One must ignore the fight or flight response to successfully use these techniques. The fight or flight response can be diminished with a successful relaxation technique. By using the chosen relaxation method, also know as progressive relaxation, one can remain anonymous in their attempt of reaching a relaxed state. This method is great for relieving muscle tension and spasms, and is even more successful when used with positive thinking. This technique helped improve the rate of anxiousness by diminishing it before it got out of hand. By remaining relaxed feelings of awkwardness were dramatically reduced. By using other relaxation techniques such as controlled breathing in combination with progressive relaxation, it is possible to reach an even more relaxed state. By training the mind to stay positive and the body to remain calm it is possible to significantly improve ones life, and with enough experience it will become easy to interact in a normal fashion, making it possible to become successful in the modern world.

References

Hobart and William Smith Colleges. (2010, December 10). HWS: Relaxation Techniques.

Retrieved October 13, 2010, from Hobart and William Smith Colleges Web site: http://www.hws.edu/studentlife/counseling_relax.aspx

Harling, I., & Nyrup, M. (2005). Relaxation. In I. Harling, & M. Nyrup, Slieght of Mind (2nd

Edition ed., pp. 60-65). Denmark: Spellbound.

National Institiute of Mental Health. (2010, December 10). The Numbers Count: Mental

Disorders in America. (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services) Retrieved November 5, 2010, from National Institiute of Mental Health Web site: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/the-numbers-count-mental-disorders-in-america/index.shtml#Social

Smith, M. ,., & Jaffe-Gill, E. M. (2010, December 10). Social Anxiety Disorder and Social

Phobia: SYMPTOMS, SELF-HELP, AND TREATMENT. Retrieved October 9, 2010, from Help Guide Web site: http://helpguide.org/mental/social_anxiety_support_symptom_causes_treatment.htm#authors

Richards, T. A. (2010, November 19). What is Compreensive Cognitive - Behavioral Therapy.

(The Social Anxiety Institute, Inc.) Retrieved October 9, 2010, from Social Anxiety Institute Web site: http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/ccbtherapy.html

DEATH AND LOSS

Death and loss

·      Fears of death and dying

o   Some of the aspects of death we may fear are –

§  Ceasing to be

§  Leaving behind those we love

§  Losing ourselves

§  Encountering the unknown

§  Coping with the indignity of a painful and long dying process

§  Growing distant in the memories of others

Death and the meaning of life

·      Life and death are the same facets of the same reality

·      Realization of death can revitalize our goals

·      Acceptance of death can lead to discovery of meaning and purpose of life

·      Because time on earth is limited, there is an urgency about living

·      Ancient Greek dictum --- “contemplate death if you would learn how to live.”

Random Extra Credit Dump

        I went to studio 8 ten with my mom. We entered the building and I realized what the organization was about right away. It is a place for people to go, so they do not feel different. It’s a place for people to go to so they can express them selves fully without being judged. At first I thought I would be walking in to an extremely large building. Before even seeing the place I expected It to be full of Paint and Pastel covered people drawing away. I was expecting six or seven people sketching a naked person with a large jeloantous overhanging belly. But this was not the case, I realized upon opening the door that the environment was different, I didn’t really look for people at first, I was too preoccupied with the gift shops image. Snowflakes fell from the ceiling, Glitter speckled on all edges. I then looked at the front desk. The receptionist, If that is the name for the position, was a young lady, she held a smile at me while I stared, with my glaze stuck. At that moment I realized the purpose for the building and the purpose for the extra credit assignment. I suddenly became quite nervous. I have had multiple classes with one or two mentally handicapped persons, but they where always the minority. I felt out of my element, because today it was I who was the minority.

            I greeted the receptionist and introduced my self. I expressed my reason for coming to the studio, and then asked for a tour. A young man stood up and greeted me. He had a strange accent and it was extremely hard to follow his speaking. I became lost in translation. I solely concentrated on trying to understand his words, because I felt that if I did not, I would seem to be a rude individual. I began asking questions. I asked questions about everything in the building, I was so nervous because I didn’t want to be seen as a threat that I did not talk to any one but our tour guide. He showed us amazing works of art, art that no one I have ever met would be able to duplicate. I saw a post card for the Barbary Coast, Its face was very abstract but very intriguing. It looked as if it was doesn’t by computer but I was told a man did it. I was shown paintings, some of the most beautiful abstract paintings I have seen in person. I was shown soaps, pillow, gift baskets, and any other sort of art you can imagine. I was amazed at the patients and time some of this art took to complete. I was honestly astonished.

            We walked to the back corner and I was shown chairs that where decorated with random art. Some of the paintings just looked unreal. There was even a cactus protruding from the seat of one, with sand and rocks by the base, emulating the Las Vegas desert very nicely. I still felt nervous, I felt as if I was being judged as different, because to me, I was different. The young man showed me a magazine with his picture on the cover, he smiled wide and proud, I flipped through the magazine and saw more amazing pieces of art. The detail and craftsmanship to some of these pieces were just too amazing. I felt bothered because I could tell they all were expecting my mother or me to purchase something, but neither of us had any money because we were both struggling financially as it is.

            The experience was very enlightening, because before that moment I had never felt that much like a minority in my life. I have been in situations where I was the only Caucasian person but I didn’t feel this kind of exoticness. I understand how it must feel to be perceived as different. I now understand that no matter what disabilities a person has, no matter if it is physical or mental, they can still have talent, and they can still be much better that you. This experience made me want to get back into art, just for the fact that these individuals do what they want no matter what the expectations.

Anger in Relationships

Anger in Relationships

A few tips in dealing with anger:

-       Value the recognition and expression of anger

-       Express anger in a way that does not assassinate another’s character

-       Don’t hold on to anger or nurse grudges

-       Recognize danger signs when anger gets in the way of relationships

-       Talk more about yourself than about what is wrong wit the other person

-       Decide when it is better not to express anger

**

Dealing effectively with conflict and confrontation

Conflict can be a healthy sign of individual differences. If conflict emerges, keep the following points in mind:

-       If you confront a person, know why

-       View confrontation as a caring act

-       Accept responsibility for your own feelings

-       Tell others how you are struggling with them

-       Don’t walk away from conflict be open to forgiving others who have hurt you

-       Be willing to forgive yourself

Barriers to effective communication

-       recognizing communication blocks is the first step forward opening the channels to dialogue

-       some barriers are:

o   hearing only what you want to hear

o   being overly concerned about getting your point across

o   silently rehearsing what you will say as you are “listening”

o   Becoming overly defensive making assumptions about the other person without checking them out

Coping worth the termination of a meaningful relationship

-       allow yourself the time to grieve

-       express your anger without violence

-       take responsibility for your own part in the relationship

-       find a support network

-       take care of other aspects of you life

-       make use of writing in your journal

-       be willing to forgive—both yourself and the other person

-       seek closure and learn from the experience

Notes by professor

solitude

first off here, is a referral link. This is just like ad sense.
http://chitika.com/publishers.php?refid=tyler101891

Solitude

·      Solitude is typically something we choose for ourselves

·      In solitude, we make time to be with ourselves and to discover who we are

·      Solitude provides an opportunity for renewal

·      Through solitude we are able to examine our lives and gain a sense of perspective

Loneliness

·      Often results from certain events in life such as:

o   Death of someone we love

o   The decision to leave a secure job for an unknown one

o   Moving to a new city

o   A long stay in a hospital

·      An experience of feelings set apart from others

·      Can indicate that we have failed to listen to our inner voice

Types of loneliness

·      Transient loneliness

o   Brief feelings of loneliness when there is a disruption in one’s social network

·      Chronic loneliness

o   When people are unable to establish meaningful interpersonal relationships over a long period of time

Types of loneliness

·      Everyday loneliness

o   The pain of being isolated from other people, which may be related to fears of intimacy, rejection, or shame

·      Existential loneliness

o   A profound sense of an unbridgeable gap that separates us from others, which is related to our awareness that each of us inhabits a world of fully known only to ourselves

Ways people attempt to escape from facing loneliness

·      Living an overscheduled life

·      Striving for perfect control of the environment

·      Surrounding ourselves with people

·      Becoming a slave to routine

·      Numbing ourselves with alcohol or drugs

·      Eating for emotional reasons

·      Spending many hours on the computer, watching T.V., playing videogames

Some consequences of shyness

·      Can make it difficult to communicate effectively and express oneself

·      Often holds people back from meeting new people

·      May result in feelings of depression, anxiety, and loneliness

·      Can hold people back in progression in education or their careers

·      Leads some individual to develop a dependency on alcohol as a way t feel more relaxed and sociable

Loneliness and the life stages

·      Childhood

o   Loneliness is an inevitable part of life beginning in childhood

o   Reliving childhood experiences of loneliness can help adults come to grips with their present fears about being alone or lonely

·      Adolescence

o   Bodily changes one’s search for identity, and the need to be accepted and liked may compound an adolescent’s feelings of loneliness

o   The price of nonconformity may be steep; Adolescents may feel all alone in the world

·      Young adult

o   How young adults come to terms with their own aloneness effects the choices they make—Choices that, in turn, may determine the course of their lives

o   Life circumstances and cultural factors also pave the way to a lonely existence

·      Middle age

o   Changes at midlife such as children leaving the nest can lead to feelings of emptiness and loss

o   Feelings dissatisfied with one’s career or life choices can exacerbate loneliness

·      The later years

o   In a society that prizes productivity, youth, beauty, power, and vitality, older adults may feel they are not needed or valued anymore

o   Loneliness of the later years can be accentuated by the losses that come with age:

§  Loss of bodily functions

§  Loss of career or jobs

§  Loss of certain hobbies

§  Loss of friends and loved ones

notes from professor.

Work and Recreation

Work and Recreation

Types of personalities

·      Realistic

·      Investigative

·      Artistic

·      Social

·      Enterprising

·      Conventional

Factors in vocational decision making

·      Motivation and achievement

·      Attitudes about occupation

·      Abilities

·      Interests

·      Values

·      Self-concept

Steps to take

·      Begin by focusing on yourself

·      Generate alternative solutions

·      Gather and asses information

·      Weigh and prioritize your alternatives

·      Make the decision and formulate a plan

·      Carry out the decision

·      Get the feedback

Jobs Advice

·      If you experience discontent in your work, focus on those factors within your job that you can change

·      Identify ways you can create meanings in your work

·      If you must remain at an unsatisfying job, find something outside your job that fulfills your need for recognition, significance, productivity, and excitement

·      Asses whether your attitudes about work help or hinder you in achieving career success

Changing careers in midlife

·      Being aware of career options is a great asset at midlife

·      Attitudes and fears about changing careers that are legt unquestioned and unexamined make change much harder

·      Both men and women may experience the desire to change career paths in midlife

·      People who feel stuck in their jobs should ask themselves whether their personal dissatisfaction outweighs the financial rewards

notes by my professor  

An Analysis of My Dreams

An Analysis of My Dreams

Through the analysis of the three most significant dreams written in my personal dream log, my subconscious desires and anxieties can be interpreted.  Research and personal interpretation have revealed that my waking life has become out of control, and the fear of loss and the desire to make a good impression can contribute to this feeling. For the past three months, I have been riding my newly acquired longboard daily without any days of rest. Since acquiring my new form of transportation, excitement is an emotion that I associate with a successful day. Living by this belief, I expect each new day to carry an increased feeling of exhaustion both mentally and physically. The physical and psychological stress put upon my body in the waking world can be revealed through the pertaining themes of my dreams.

Dream # 1

The first dream recorded in my journal has two separate parts that seem very different, but carry the same themes. In the beginning of the dream, I am on a mountain bike riding at extremely dangerous speeds down a steep hill. I associated the surrounding buildings and scenery with San Francisco, as there was a red bridge in the background. As I fly down the hill waiting for the deadly crash that awaited me I observe an audience and camera men watching me with great awe. The host of the event stands and recites the challenge of the new and exciting reality show that I am unwillingly apart of. As I am flying down the long terrifying hill I see multiple other contestants ahead of me losing control and tumbling down the steep decline. Upon reaching the end of the hill at a very unreasonable speed, I am flung of the bike and tumble down the rest of the hill, as the crowd cheers with excitement. After I come to a rest I immediately stand up and to my surprise I have received no injury. After assessing the damage, I am approached by a man from audience who asks me if I would like to work for the city’s most successful restaurant. Without hesitation I agree, and follow the man a few yards away to a shack like building. Upon entering the simplistic building I am surprised by a large group of people surrounding a table of odd looking foods. The group all wore a simple black uniform which I was now wearing. I proceed to walk to the first person to introduce myself and after receiving a complex name, I pick up an extra-large tortilla and a cake decorator filled with a guacamole like paste. I begin writing each name on the tortilla in hopes of remembering them all, and after finishing we all sit and start eating the large array of unrecognizable food before us. Without thinking I slather the tortilla with beans accidentally ruining my edible name sheet, I take a bite and wake up in a state of regret.

Analysis of Dream #1

The first part of the dream can show a person falling down a hill with no sense of control, the crowd awaiting their humiliation. Dreams of falling occur when one feels completely overwhelmed or out of control ("I'm Falling".(n.d)). This can be explained by my inexperience with writing college papers and the overwhelming, almost terrifying thoughts of failure. The fact that I was recently fired can also contribute to the feeling of not being in control. In the dream, not gaining control in time brings about a horrible accident, as my peers watch in amusement. This can symbolize an assumption of unworthiness and a feeling of being singled out by society. It can express the pressure to live a successful life, and if one does not succeed one fails and becomes a laughing stock.  “Falling dreams also often reflect a sense of failure or inferiority in some circumstance or situations.”(I'm Falling, n.d). “To see an unruly crowd in your dream signifies that the worries and problems around you are pressing in on you. You are expressing great distress.”( Crowd, n.d). The fact that I fell and was embarrassed shows my lack of self-confidence. “To dream that you are embarrassed signifies hidden weaknesses, fears and lack of self-confidence.”(Embarrassment, n.d).

The second part of the dream I receive a great job, and I am so preoccupied with making a good impression that I forget what I tried to remember. “To dream that you are at work, indicates that you are experiencing some anxiety about a current project or task. The dream may also be telling you that you need to "get back to work".  Perhaps you have been slacking off and need to pick up the pace. Stop procrastinating. Alternatively, the dream reflects your success.” (Work, n.d). Since being fired my main goal has been to find a new job, but I have still not turned in a single application. I have been filled with a sense of failure, which has been keeping me from going out and taking the initiative.  I think of myself as an insignificant person who can be replaced easily, I don’t feel worthy of even the most simple positions.  This can be shown by my failed effort of meeting my expectations of a good impression. This can express my insecurities, and my tact for forgetting names. Eating the tortilla can symbolize a personal choice ruining a chance for renewal. This can come from recently being fired due to failing a drug test for marijuana. This also shows how out of control my life feels, how I feel shunned by society just because I enjoy sensimilla, or because I try to live life to my own standards.

Dream #2

I dream I am at a Nirvana concert, but instead of the band the crowd watches a projection of the band on a white movie screen. I am perched directly in the center of the mosh pit and I am being tossed around like a ragdoll. I am the smallest skinniest individual in a small room packed with fat but strong looking men. As I try to escape the sea of bodies I am thrown to the floor by the biggest guy in the pit. I lay helpless being stepped on and kicked about until finally I am picked up by the man who put me there in the first place. As I escape the pit and regain my composure, I see my sister with her boyfriend by bleachers, filled with spectators. I tell them that I am leaving and pick up my Longboard which lay next to them. I exit the building and begin skating around the parking lot which resembled a park by my old elementary school. I then wake up wishing it was a real Nirvana concert.

Analysis of Dream #2

I dreamt of a concert for a band associated with my past, except the band was not real, and I am tossed around like a ragdoll feeling helpless, my survival in the hands of another. Being in a helpless situation can show “Some aspect of your life where you feel vulnerable or like you could use some help” (helpless or vulnerable, n.d). Being the smallest and youngest person in the crowd can show a feeling of weakness. “To dream that you are weak, refers to your feelings of inadequacy” (Weak, n.d). This can express my feeling of being vulnerable to violence, how I have a feeling of being inadequate at defending myself. Being picked up by someone I do not recognize signifies not having a choice of salvation. It may express the apprehension to ask for help, waiting for it rather than asking. It can convey the idea of not being in control of one’s life, taking the abuse from the older generation. My sister could be a form of protection, there to make me feel at ease (Sister, n.d). Exiting the concert can express a feeling of wanting to end a situation in the waking life (exit, n.d). My longboard can be a familiar item that further calms me down. It can signify my free, fun-loving side (skateboard, n.d) that only comes out when I am not facing my problems.

Dream #3

I dreamt I was walking around the neighborhood and I stumble upon a newly opened skateboard shop. I enter the store and see a familiar board; I immediately buy it with no hesitation. I exit the store and begin skating toward Albertsons. Upon arriving I try a 180 power slide and to my surprise I do it for the first time ever. It felt extremely simple as I did it about four more time until finally I do a 360. After sticking it I try again and my board breaks. I felt regretful and immediately I go back to the skate shop and buy another one. After exiting the skate shop for the second time, I head to my marijuana dealers house. Upon entering I start smoking cannabis and talking about my ne board. I ask him if he wanted to ride it and he refused. Telling me, ”No way, I’ll bust my ass.” After his refusal I leave for Albertsons. While skating on the sidewalk I see a man and woman standing by the bus stop. Immediately after spotting them a North Las Vegas Police car drives past. The man and woman immediately start making out as if they were hiding something. I skate past them, finally arriving at Albertsons. I noticed how bad the qualities of the trucks were; they wobbled, as if they were not even bolted down. I proceeded to do more 360s and 180s and upon attempting an Ollie my second board snaps. I wake up feeling accomplished, with an urge to pick up an Earthwing “La Paloma Rapido” skateboard deck.

Analysis of Dream #3

I dreamt about stumbling upon a store that does not exist in waking life and buying something I desire only to break it immediately afterward, I then accomplish a feat that once seemed implausible. Finding a skate shop can express a desire for a neighborhood skate shop in real life. Buying something in a dream can express ones desires and how to acquire them (shopping, n.d). Breaking my newly acquired skate board can signify the short lived joy that comes from buying something desired. Skateboards may not break that easily in real life but it can still signify how nothing is forever and how you can’t always decide when something should come to an end. It expressed a feeling of not being in control. Smoking marijuana in the dream can express a feeling of “…experiencing an expanded sense of awareness and consciousness,” (Marijuana, n.d). The couple making out in a suspicious way can show my distrust for humanity or a distrust of the police. In a way this dream illustrates that buying happiness is only a quick fix that does not last long. Buying two boards that broke can show a feeling of insignificance. Buy buying two bad quality boards I assume I am a bad decision maker.

Conclusion

In conclusion, my dreams express a lack of control in my life, showing me that to gain control I must ignore the standards set by my peers. It expresses a feeling of being bullied by older generations and the struggles associated with breaking free of this feeling. The key topic of these dreams is that no one can take control of my life but me, and that I must ignore my insecurities and fight for what I believe in.

References

I'm Falling. (n.d). Retrieved from

http://dreammoods.com/cgibin/fallingdreams.pl?method=exact&header=dreamid&search=fallingintro

Crowd. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/c4.htm 

Embarrassment. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/e.htm   

Work. (n.d).   Retrieved from   http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/w3.htm

helpless or vulnerable. (n.d). Retrieved from

http://www.mydreamvisions.com/dreamdictionary/symbol.php?DreamMeaningID=2117

Weak. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/w2.htm

Sister. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/s2.htm

Exit. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/e2.htm

Skateboard. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/s2.htm

Shopping. (n.d). Retrieved from http://www.unclesirbobby.org.uk/dreamessayshop.php

Marijuana. (n.d). Retrieved from  http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/m.htm